The Return Threshold

I opened my eyes, trying to shake the dream-state that still lingered. While I was still asleep, I dreamed that someone had touched me, telling me that I must wake up. So I woke, cutting the story as if the ending of my dream was not important. I realized that there were many people standing in my room and all of them wore black. All were silent, their hands clasped in front of them. They stared at me, then slowly parted to make way for the man I had seen before. He walked through them and stood before my bed and the television. On the television was a single image: me, lying on my bed. It was as if the screen was a mirror of the room. I watched myself on the television. I seemed to be asleep but then my mouth opened, and I began to speak.

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Jeanne awoke to the sound of the Angelus bell being rung at the church. The sun was rising over Doremy and a new day had begun. She had fallen asleep at her window again. Her knees were sore but she remained kneeling. As the first three peels of the bell finished, she prayed. The bell rang three more times and she prayed again. Finally, the third set of bells rang and she prayed a final time. Finally, she arose and remembered why she had fallen asleep. She glanced toward the church in the distance and the Voices echoed in her memory. She had tried to maintain a vigil overnight, a kind of penance for her inaction. She had again been charged with a sacred mission and she could no longer ignore it.

But first, she joined her family for breakfast. Her mother was already diligently preparing the morning meal. She immediately made to help her mother, who smiled at her and told her to wash up first. Jeanne splashed the water over her face and felt herself suddenly lost. The water was not refreshing in the usual way but seemed a baptism. She made the sign of the cross and went to help her mother. Silently and obediently, she helped prepare the food for the men in her family, and ate only after they had eaten. After breakfast she asked her mother if she could go to church and pray and visit their relatives in Burey-le-Petit. Her mother seemed concerned that her daughter might again be wearing the knees out of her dress but gave her permission as she always did. Jeanne hurried to the church. She had a long journey ahead of her and she wished to take communion and confess her sins before she left. Her confessor sensed her urgency and begged her to take care of herself as she traveled.

Her purpose was not to visit her family but to again go to the castle at Vaucouleurs and request the assistance of Robert de Baudricourt. It was his destiny to bear her to the Dauphin. He had rejected her message in their previous encounter but this time the situation was far more dire. Orleans was in danger and if that city fell, then the whole of France was hopeless. She was running out of time and must act quickly if she were to fulfill her task.

When she finally arrived in Vaucouleurs, Sir Robert was receptive to her and promised his assistance. There was an ancient prophesy about a maiden saving the country. At the very least, her very attitude was inspiring. She was a source of hope that the soldiers and the people desperately needed. Of course, de Baudricourt would have to be sure that she was not an impostor. It was possible that she could use that old legend to her own advantage. Also, it was necessary to be sure that she was not a lunatic with a good imagination. She said that she had received a message from the Saints, whom were the messengers of Heaven. If anyone could determine her legitimacy, it was Father Jean.

Jean Fournier, the priest of the castle, was sent to Jeanne. He had met her before and had been her confessor on her previous visit. He had to be careful that she had not been influenced by devils, so upon entering the room where she was, he entreated her only to come to her if she was not evil. He touched her with holy water and she did not shrink away. All this time she obeyed his word and approached him on her knees. He was impressed with her humility and he told her to stand up. He asked her a few simple questions about the Voices she heard and asked if they had ever led her into sin. To this she responded that they never asked anything but commanded her to be the instrument of God. She was sound in mind and pure in heart and he informed Sir Robert that she was genuine. She may indeed be the maid of the prophesy and the instrument of God. Sir Robert de Baudricourt immediately sent a message onto Chinon and the Royal Court, but Jeanne would have to wait for a response before departing.

Jeanne waited many long weeks for an answer. In the meantime, she busied herself helping the Mistress de Baudricourt, spinning and doing all sorts of chores. When she was not attending the work of the house, she was often praying in the chapel. It was a small church, especially when compared to others she had attended, but it gave her a chance to reflect on her mission. It was with great sadness she often knelt before the image of Mary and prayed fervently that she be forgiven her sins and granted the means to finish her mission. The priests marveled at her humility and the soldiers of the castle were inspired by her unfailing hope. Finally, the answer from Chinon arrived and she set out to meet her destiny.